Finding Your Own Song

Your own song.

That’s an intriguing concept.

When a couple gets married, they chose a song that they will carry with them.

For Donna and me, it was “That’s all.”

I can only give you love that lasts forever…That’s all. That’s all.

Years later, whenever we’re at a party where there is a band, we’ll ask if they would play our song. And that dance is always special, bringing back welcome, sometimes long-forgotten, memories.

And it got me to wondering why weddings are the only celebrations where we select a particular song.

Why not birthdays?

Or any other celebration?

And what would your own theme song be – if you selected it yourself?

Would you have just one song?

Or would it change at different times in your life?

Who has their own song?

Luke Skywalker has an epic theme song, full of hope and grandeur, whenever he enters a dramatic scene in the Star Wars movies.

And, of course, Popeye the Sailor Man has his own theme song. He is strong to the finish, ‘cause he ate his…spinach.

I’ve heard it said that there is a tribe on the west coast of Africa where, when a woman believes she wants to have a baby, she will hear a song and start to sing it. And that song becomes the song of her baby – before the child is born. Then the preparing mother teaches that song to her husband, before they conceive their child. Then when their child appears, they both teach the song to the baby, who carries that song throughout his or her life.

To have your own song.

Perhaps it could get you more in tune with yourself.

And, because of that, just maybe, a bit more in tune with others.

So, try this with me for a minute.

Close your eyes.

Imagine there is as an old-fashioned Juke Box – inside of you.

Each of us is full of hundreds and hundreds of records.

There are A and B sides.

Some we know by heart.

Some we barely remember.

Some are connected to certain events in our lives.

Some are connected to certain people.

Some are covered in dust, not even remembering the last time they were played.

They range from the first tunes we were lulled to sleep by to the last song we heard today.

Imagine all of those songs in the juke box inside of you.

Imagine them all being on small, plastic, round records.

In rows, upon rows, upon rows.

And across all these rows is a metal arm that will reach down and select one of those records….your song.

Inside your own personal, old-fashioned juke box…that metal arm is moving across all of the songs inside of you.

And now, as you push the letter “J”.

And the arm is moving down to the row of records marked by the letter “J”.

And now you push the number 10.

And that metal arm is sliding over and selecting the number 10.

That’s the song you selected.

Look at the title.

Say it out loud to yourself.

Now let it play.

Hum it.

Sing it.

Why do you believe you might have selected your song?

What does it mean to you?

What was going on in your life when you first heard the song?

Why have you been carrying it with you?

Feel what it is like to tune in to your song.

What if that became your inspiration?

Your theme song?

How would you come across differently?

Do me a favor and carry the song with you for a week.

Hum or sing it to yourself whenever times get out of sort.

Or when things are just going exceptionally well.

See how it fits.

How does it help you think and feel about yourself differently?

About those around you in a new way?

Does it help you make sense of what’s going on?

Does it tie things together in some mysterious way?

As you hum or sing your song, the next step is to share it with someone you love.

Tell them why you carry your song with you.

Let them know what it means to you.

And why you’ve stayed connected with your song.

And ask them if they’ve ever thought about a song that would be their theme song.

And wonder, with them, what it might be.

Then see if your songs connect.

In the end, our connection with others helps us connect with ourselves.

It could all start with the song inside of you.

At the very least, people are going to be wonder what in the world you’re singing about.